The Snake or the Ladder: Why Living Offense-Free Changes Everything
We've all been there. Someone cuts you off in traffic. A coworker takes credit for your idea. Your spouse snaps at you after a long day. A friend forgets to text back. In those moments, you have a choice: catch the offense or let it pass by.
Pastor Dave recently unpacked one of the most challenging yet relevant teachings of Jesus—how the commandment "you shall not murder" actually speaks to the everyday anger and offense we all wrestle with. While most of us will never commit murder, Jesus revealed in Matthew 5 that harboring anger, speaking contemptuous words, and holding onto bitterness puts us in spiritual danger.
The Game We're All Playing
Using the ancient game of Snakes and Ladders (originally called "The Path to Salvation"), Pastor Dave illustrated how life presents us with daily choices. We can step onto virtues that move us forward like ladders, or we can step onto vices that pull us backward like snakes. Offense is one of the most dangerous snakes we encounter—not because it harms the other person, but because it puts us in debt.
When we hold onto hurt, we end up seeing the entire world through the lens of one person's offense or one painful circumstance. We rehearse conversations in our heads. We build cases for why we're right. We store up anger in our hearts. And all the while, we're the ones being held captive.
The Freedom of Not Catching It
The first and best defense against offense is simple: don't catch it in the first place. When someone throws offense your way, you don't have to grab it and pull it close. Slow down. Pause the conversation. Refuse to let gossip gain momentum. Choose not to rehearse the argument in your car on the way home.
But when offense is legitimate and deep, we can't just pretend it doesn't exist. We must acknowledge it, take responsibility for our part (90% of offenses happen in two-way conversations), and deal with our hearts quickly—ideally within 24 hours.
Stepping on Ladders Instead
Living offense-free isn't passive—it's proactive. We don't just avoid snakes; we intentionally step on ladders. We bless those who hurt us. We humble ourselves even when we're right. We choose forgiveness, knowing that it's not just about the other person—it's about our own freedom.
Jesus modeled this perfectly. In His most offensive moment, hanging on a cross for sins He didn't commit, He prayed, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." That's the ultimate ladder—choosing blessing over bitterness even in agony.
The Power That Sets You Free
Forgiveness is a superpower. It doesn't excuse wrong behavior, but it releases you from the prison of holding onto it. Reconciliation puts a period at the end of a painful chapter and says, "It's finished."
Because we've been forgiven through Christ, we don't have the right to hold onto offense against others. When we choose to forgive, we step onto ladders that elevate our lives toward the freedom and fullness God intends for us.
Today, you have a choice: the snake or the ladder. Choose freedom.